Pardon My Dust

Sunday, December 02, 2012

Well, for starters, call me Morgaine.  My first entries are always so bloody awkward.  Even now, I'm sitting here staring at these first 3 sentences wondering if it's going to sound as ridiculous as I think.  Beh.  Whatever.

So, here's the deal:  I'm a Witch.  If you're reading this and you're not overly acquainted with witches or Pagans, perhaps you find yourself picturing ridiculous stereotypes.  Green skin, perhaps?  Warts?  Or maybe something more modern.  Perhaps I walk around permanently bedecked in Goth clothing.  Maybe I'm like one of those girls off of "The Craft"?

Psh!  Nah.   My skin is most definitely normal; while I enjoy the Goth fashions I hardly ever get to wear them (I'm particularly fond of corsets but I don't currently have any as mine got lost in a series of moves :-(  It sucks).  In fact, if you could see me right now, you'd find me wearing my favorite comfy pair of Broncos loungers and a t-shirt with a nifty wolf picture on it.  I did have the misfortune of having to deal with warts when I was a child, so that's probably about as close to any bullshit stereotypes that I get.

I don't suppose that such a thought is as shocking as it would have been at one time.  When I was a child, it would have been more of a shock to learn that your normal-looking next door neighbor was a Witch.  It's not that it was so terribly long ago that I was a child, but I grew up in a very conservative atmosphere where everyone seriously believed that if you were a Witch that meant you worshiped Satan.  I cannot even begin to describe how much that one makes my eyes roll.  Of course, I have to put my quirky sense of humor into it and joke that we actually worship Santa.

Yeah.  I'm a dork.

Truthfully, though, I worship God and Goddess.  I also have an actual matron Goddess that I worship and that would be the Goddess Brighid.  I don't view Her as being separate from the Mother, I just connect with Her as a particular face of the Mother.  As for God, I don't have a patron, but I grew up in a Christian home, so I pretty much just connect with Him the way I did even back then.

And, really, I have to touch on something:  It bugs me when I hear other Pagans snidely refer to Him as "the Christian God".  Meh.  That's just a personal pet peeve of mine.  See, to me?  All Gods are one God.  All Goddesses are one Goddess.  They are the Father and the Mother.  Hell, I even still believe in Jesus.  I just don't see the Divine in the same way as the Christians do.

For instance, there is so much of the Bible that I don't put any stock into. According to them, God is supposed to be the same Yesterday, Today, and Forever, yes?  Well, the God that I know and look up to is a loving Father.  He knows how to get stern when he needs to, but he's not abusive and, I'm sorry, but the God that gets described in the Bible?  If any human were to act like that, they'd be branded an abusive motherfucker.  God is not like that.  That's just how the Bible (with the exception of Christ, you might notice) and Christians (generally speaking) paint Him up as.  And it's sickening, really.  But whatever.  I'm not going to get into all that right now.

I have three children that I'm trying to raise in the Craft.  I often find myself envying the people who were raised in Paganism.  Being raised in Christianity, it didn't take much effort.  Obviously, we went to church on Sundays and even on Wednesdays. And, of course, there is a wealth of reading and learning materials at the Christians' disposal.  Now, the treasure trove of informative Pagan books are getting ever more vast.  Many are geared toward helping the beginner Pagan with beginning their path. Still more are there to help the beginner progress to higher levels.  There are Pagan books for just about anything you can think of.  But the number of Pagan books for Pagan Parenting or even Pagan books for children to read are not nearly as abundant in comparison.

And churches?  Pfffft!!!  Yeah, right.  Y'all would not believe how difficult it is to find a Circle or anything that is family-oriented where the kids are allowed to join and participate.  Even at my local CUUPS a great many of the circles are for adults only.  *sigh*  So that's another huge challenge for me.  But we do the best we can.  I have a few books geared toward Pagan parents, one of which is Circle Round by Starhawk.  I haven't been able to go through it very thoroughly yet, but I've met many people who swear by it.  At some point I definitely want to acquire the CD that goes with it.

In the meantime, this is....well....this is my new blog.  I used to have a couple Bloggers but those just......meh.  Fizzled out?  Like, for some reason, they didn't feel like home for me.  Does that make sense?  Plus, this year I had tried to do the 2012 Pagan Blog Project as put on by the awesome Rowan Pendragon.  I'd only managed to get up to the...E's or F's I think?  But it fizzled because of a whole bunch of shit that was going on at the time.  This upcoming year I am actually really hoping I can keep up with the whole thing.  *crosses fingers*

We'll see.  As I mention in my header, I'm not the greatest at juggling and already I have to try to balance work, family, college, and my spirituality.  On top of that I'm wanting to lose weight, get into writing more poetry, AND now I have the Pagan Blog Project 2013 that I'm going to try to keep up with.  Woo Hoo!!!

Craziness.

For now I'm just trying to get this blog established.  I don't expect to be as well-known as my friend Stephanie (The Coexist Cafe) or even like Angela Pippinger (The Pagan Mom Blog) or Kallan Kennedy (The Secret Life of the American Working Witch).  I just want this place to get out my own thoughts regarding Pagan spirituality and whatever else crosses my fancy.

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